


Reverse Sexiling

by thedaughterofkings



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - No Werewolves, M/M, Sexiling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-08
Updated: 2015-10-08
Packaged: 2018-04-25 11:23:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4958713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedaughterofkings/pseuds/thedaughterofkings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles loves Scott, he really does, but unannounced surprise sexiling is not cool, particularly when your girlfriend has her own room all to herself. But perhaps the tall guy with the angelic blond curls can help him with his revenge?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Reverse Sexiling

**Author's Note:**

  * For [xinio](https://archiveofourown.org/users/xinio/gifts).



> First published on my tumblr [here](http://thedaughterofkings.tumblr.com/post/101883264256/we-both-got-kicked-out-of-our-rooms-because-our), written for Mal who asked for:  
> 'we both got kicked out of our rooms because our roommates are having sex so now we're standing in the hallway avoiding each other' STISAAC :D
> 
> Beta-read by the lovely [Larissa](http://www.ohfuckthisshit.tumblr.com)!

“Uhm...”

Stiles scuffled his foot along the carpet and sneaked looks out of the corner of his eye at the tall guy that had just come out of the room across from his. He didn't seem to be doing anything; closing the door behind him, he'd raised an eyebrow at Stiles before he’d proceeded to ignore him.

Stiles would really like to do the same because this was too awkward even for him – but when it was quiet in the hallway he could hear faint sounds coming from his room and there was just no way he ever needed to hear what Scott sounded like getting some. And Allison would probably kill him if she caught him eavesdropping – even if it was entirely against his will!

“Sooooo, come here often?” he asked, throwing in an exaggerated wink for the hell of it.

Angelic curls just threw him a totally unangelic glare and kept staring at his phone.

Stiles slid down the wall and hugged his knees, decidedly not pouting. What was the guy's deal, really? Couldn't they just be two guys, making awkward conversation sitting awkwardly in a hallway? Though...

“What are you doing here by the way? I know why I'm sitting here and cursing that I didn't bring my headphones, but what about you?”

Scott – bless his heart – had perfect timing and underlined his question with a drawn out moan. Before cherub could say anything though, there was an answering moan – coming from the room across the hall! Suddenly Stiles felt so much better.

“You were sexiled as well!” He shouted excitedly and pointed at the guy sitting across from him.

“And?”

Wow, an actual verbal answer! Not much in terms of vocabulary but Stiles didn't let himself be discouraged.

“And that means we need to do something about it! We need to get revenge! To avenge ourselves! To get justice for us, and our families, and –”

“And dishonor on your cow, I know. Your point being?”

Stiles gaped quietly for a second or two. The nerve!

“Ey, cloud nine, no cutting my flow! But seriously – hah, Siriusly, get it?” Judging by the eye roll the devil in disguise did get it – but didn't appreciate it. Traitor.

Another moan – again from halo boy's room – but this one decidedly more high pitched than the ones from before cut into his thoughts. Stiles suddenly slammed down both of his hands, hitting the floor with a resounding thump.

“Duuuuuuuuude!!! I know what we're gonna do!!”

His announcement was at best received with indifference unfortunately.

“Don't call me 'dude'. And what the hell are you even talking about?”

“Weeeeeell, Gabriel, dear, I am talking about our epic revenge for being sexiled!”

Stiles paused dramatically.

“Reverse sexiling!”

He grinned widely and even included some jazz hands because you never went wrong with jazz hands. His fallen angel – because, really, he'd obviously fallen – on his head – just stared at him with a face that clearly expressed the “What the fuck” he so obviously wanted to say.

“Reverse sexiling, Michael, my man! Like in Easy A, just with us outside! Well, and the disproving of straightness obviously. And a whole lot disruption of sexy times!”

Because really, Scott was his bff and bro and brother in all but blood, but unannounced surprise sexiling was not cool! Particularly when your girlfriend had her own room all to herself!

Angel curls – dammit, he was running out of angel nicknames – seemed to finally get it if the smirk slowly spreading across his face was any indication. It had a decidedly mean twist to it that did things to Stiles' innards. This wasn't the smirk of someone willing to prank; this was the smirk of someone willing to go all out and oh, Stiles was so in.

“So how do you want to do this? Just bang on our respective walls and moan a bit?”

“Oh Raphael, my sweet summer child! No, we are going to do so much better than that! We are going to start with a barely audible pianissimo that will creep into their subconscious and then keep dialing it up until we climax in a glorious fortissimo after a crescendo that they can't help but listen to!”

That judgmental eyebrow was back.

“Climax. Really.”

“Oh shut it, Uriel, never taken musical theory? Now come on, I sense a lull in the background music and we need to get this show on the road before they reach climax. Now, you go moan into my keyhole and I'll moan into yours.”

That … sounded better in his head. Oh well, Stiles was long past the point of no return; he wasn't going to get his dignity back anytime soon with this conversation anyways. And at least this time, he was rewarded by not only another eye roll but with a faint blush covering those cheekbones.

“And what am I supposed to moan, all wise and mighty?!”

Stiles grinned and winked at his soon-to-be reverse sexile partner.

“Well, I do like the sound of that! But just because it's you, Samael, you can call me Stiles!”

And he threw in a flutter of his lashes, just for fun's sake.

Angel boy muttered something about that not being a name that Stiles helpfully ignored – it wouldn't do to get into an argument right now – though he had heard that make up sex was supposed to be great, surely that went for make up reverse sexiling as well!

His thoughts were rudely interrupted by curlylocks speaking up again.

“What?” Stiles asked absentmindedly, brain still mostly occupied with thoughts of make up sex with –

“Isaac. My name's Isaac. You'd best remember it because I want to hear you moan it.”

Oh, and now it was Stiles's turn to blush. Cursed fair complexion. The line wasn't even all that racy to begin with! Though the blue steel he was confronted with right now probably played a part in it as well.

Stiles cleared his throat and then said: “Well, to boldly go then!”

And he could swear he heard Isaac mutter: “Well, no man's certainly ever gone there before!”

But before he could pester him about getting his Star Trek references and whether that meant that there were long evenings in his future where he didn't have to drool over Captain Kirk and Spock on his own anymore, Isaac pushed himself off the floor, took the two steps needed to reach Stiles and Scott's door and fell to his knees in front of it. And then he let out the filthiest moan Stiles had ever heard outside of porn. And with Stiles still sitting directly next to his door, it sounded as though the moan was meant for him alone.

Blushing bright red, Stiles scrambled onto his knees and quickly crawled away from Isaac to the door across from him, rather than risk standing up and fall down again because of all of his blood seeming to gather in either his face or, well, lower.

Isaac let out another moan and then turned back to Stiles and hissed: “Come on, give Erica a run for her money already! She's been unbearably smug about finally getting Boyd to man up and thus getting some regularly!”

Stiles nodded quickly, turned towards his keyhole, took a deep breath and then let out a long drawn out moan.

Isaac echoed it from behind him and then they were off, each moan sparking off another, more exaggerated one, until they were both almost sobbing – from barely suppressed laughter rather than ecstasy unfortunately, but it did make for a good effect.

Stiles was in the middle of a particularly loud and high pitched “Oh yeeeeeeeeees, Iiiiiiiisaaaaaaac!” when the door in front of him suddenly opened and left him staring at the sweatpants clad crotch of a guy rather than a keyhole.

He slowly looked up to discover a large black guy with his arms crossed over his naked – and impressive, he noted – chest staring down at him. Draped over his shoulders was a blonde girl with a smirk on her red lips.

Stiles waved awkwardly up at them and said: “Hi! You must be Erica! I've heard so much of you already!”

Her smirk only grew more pronounced at that while her boyfriend simply sighed. Stiles was about to say something else, when he realized that Isaac's moans had stopped even before his.

He slowly turned around and discovered that their tactic had evidently worked on Scott as well because he was standing in their doorway, apparently … holding back a livid looking Allison that was brandishing their bread knife?

Stiles leaped up, grabbing Isaac's hand and dragging him along.

“Run! She's armed! And don't forget to run in zig-zags, that makes it harder for her to hit you!”

“Not even running in zig-zags is going to save you from me, Stiles Stilinski! You better run, and you better run fast because I'm going to make you regret this! I swear by Lydia!” Allison screamed after him, hopefully still being restrained by Scott.

Stiles gripped Isaac's hand tighter and put on another burst of speed, running down the corridor towards the stairs with Allison's shouts ringing after them.

Only when they had reached the street, did he slow down and tried to take deep gulping breaths between the guffaws that forced themselves out.

“That was amazing! Did you see their faces? Oh it so worked, none of them crossed the finish line tonight!”

Isaac's answer was just another eye roll but Stiles was sure it was already far fonder than it had been just shortly ago. He grinned back, still giggling sporadically when he remembered Allison's wild hair or the pink sweatpants Isaac's friend had worn which had to belong to his girlfriend.

A tug on his hand made him realize he was still clutching at Isaac. But when he tried to let go of it, blushing madly again, Isaac gripped him more tightly, that faint blush again visible on his cheeks.

“Come on, what do you say to celebrating our achievement? Coffee's on me; I know a coffee shop where we won't have to pay immediately; Laura'll let us just pay it next week or so.”

Stiles smiled and nodded and – emboldened by the fact that neither of them had let go of their hands yet – asked: “Are we talking coffee here, or coffee coffee?”

Isaac squeezed his hand again and replied: “Well, currently I'm talking reverse sexiling victory coffee here, but who knows, it might lead to actual sexiling coffee!”

Stiles squeezed back and said: “You are aware that revenge is a dish best served cold? We'd have to be very careful about the planning of any sexiling!”

Isaac smirked again and said: “I'm sure we can be creative,” and then proceeded to drag him down the street, presumably towards the promised coffee.

 

Reverse sexiling coffee, Stiles thought contentedly. And perhaps even sexiling coffee!


End file.
